Farewell Letter by Janusz Zajdel – My Review

Hi, everyone! 🙂

Thanks to one of the recent prompts, I’ve decided to return to writing book reviews and sharing my thoughts and impressions about novels and stories I’ve lately read. I helps me organize my reflections, and I hope it will be useful to you too, especially if you are as passionate about literature as I am and you are looking for fresh recommendations 🙂

I learned about J. Zajdel through my husband, who knows of my love for the sci-fi genre, so he suggested I start reading this author, claiming that his style is somewhat like S. Lem. In truth, this isn’t entirely accurate. J. Zajdel was the second well-known sci-fi writer in Poland (after Lem), and they both wrote dystopian and sci-fi literature. However, while Lem often conveyed his novels in a very philosophical, sometimes even lofty fashion, which I personally appreciate a lot, Zajdel had a dry, consistent, logical style. This was probably affected by his other profession; he graduated with a major in physics and worked as a radiological engineer. One of his aims was to popularize science through literature, while another was to criticize the society and political states of his time (communism and dictatorships), which he brilliantly did.

Speaking strictly about the review topic, Farewell Letter is a short story collection composed by the author’s friends and wife after he died. It consists of his various pieces written at different moments of his life. It perfectly reflects his writing progress and gives insight into the constantly changing scope of the ideas that interested him. This collection also includes his interview, some excerpts from his novels, outlines for unpublished books and stories – very intriguing, by the way (he died at the age of 46, so he left them unfinished), and the recollections from his close circle, which portray J. Zajdel from the personal perspective. We get to know that he was a very warm and supportive friend and that he basically nurtured the present and future generation of Polish sci-fi authors.

His works were classified as sci-fi and dystopian. Still, you won’t find the mystical or pure fantasy elements in his stories, as was common with Bradbury or Lem. His narratives are very logical, concise, and painfully possible. In fact, he introduced some fictional aspects in his stories, like UFOs, teleportation, or alternative realities, but as I said before, it was not a typical fantasy fiction. These ideas and concepts are considered hypothetically possible by science. So the author described them as theories and paradoxes and played them out beautifully, testing them in his creative pieces. Also, everything happening on the pages of this story collection is justified and explained, providing a background for action. Most of the stories have nice dynamics and brilliant irony that balances his somewhat dry descriptions, which, along with capturing dynamics saves his literature from becoming dull or monotonous. My favorite among his works from this collection was The Other Side of the Mirror, because it included the elements I like: thrilling concepts (Zajdel played with a theory about dimensions and teleportation) and thought-provoking elements, something that broadens reader’s horizons.

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False Memories (Part 1)

Part 2
Part 3
Part 4

DISCLAIMER: the events and the characters mentioned in this story are the product of the author’s imagination

I guess it all began the moment I slammed the door loudly, causing the tiny rivers and streams of stone dust and chalk to run down onto the floor. I quickly scrutinized the tiny crevices and cracks around the doorframe – eternal remnants of my mood swings and our bitter quarrels… I ran down the steps diving into the silver moonlight that stole all the colors of this world except for black and white… 

I could discern the catlike silhouettes in the silver slits of windows. All the voices from different flats were mixed and united in one preaching chorus, and all the graffities and scribbles that casually adorned the staircase during the day now were turned into magical patterns and figures. Like cavemen, we continue on and on to mark our achievements, wishes and feelings, etching them deep into the wall.

The entrance door swung open, welcoming the wet, damp wind to fill the darkness. A few rare cool drops of rain fell on my face, mingling and mixing with tears, calming me, reviving and suddenly filling everything with a sense of hope again. I went out, looking up at the sky and breathing deeply, trying to regain composure. My jacket was unzipped carelessly, my strides were long and bold… It was an attempt to become one with the wind, one with the coming storm, to cast off all formalities, reject the laws of physics, and fly over the earth in elemental fury.

A burning array of yellow windows was outlined brightly against the gray carcasses of the buildings, almost indiscernible in the surrounding darkness… I wish I could say the same about the drunken crowd of people, who were shouting and cursing loudly, while checking out the surroundings with an immense hunger for destruction. So I halted for a moment, praying to become invisible. 

Continue reading “False Memories (Part 1)”

Shadow Path (part 4)

Parts:
1st part;
2nd part;
3d part;
4th part;
5th part

Finally, she was in bed, her sweet bay of calmness and safe abode for her body when her soul was lost in other worlds. Ani simultaneously felt a relaxing warmth and intense exultation – now it would happen, she would finally find a way to infinity, now, she had an opportunity to join it. She took the pills…then she waited for half an hour, but still she wasn’t sleeping. ‘How long should I wait for it to come?’ The pillow was utterly uncomfortable, so Ani tossed and turned in her bed, twisting and rolling her pillow in countless ways she could stack under her head, covering and uncovering herself with the blanket, feeling either too cold or too warm, until finally the girl simply threw both the blanket and the pillow away, laying on her back and looking at the ceiling.

After some time the thought struck her: ‘I need more’. So Ani took more, and after the following hours of irritating insomnia, she started taking handful after handful of pills. This time, the girl swallowed medicine with wine, drinking more and more of it, until she finally felt at ease and relaxed. The world was swirling, everything was swaying, changing in its liquid, unstable forms – somewhat like Dali’s aesthetics. She felt a great pressure on her body, as if being under many gallons of water. The girl wouldn’t move at this moment, she simply transformed, twisted and shifted her form a uncountable number of times…and dissolved…

Ani appeared in the empty dark room with the windows facing the forest. It was night, and the enormous full moon had risen above, lighting this place poorly. When the girl’s eyes adjusted to the darkness, she saw that the walls of the building were crumbling and decrepit. Ani felt with all her soul that she was utterly, absolutely alone in this place, with no living soul around. She felt an eerie, maddening terror. And then she understood that it had been a dream. In the corner, she saw the trembling shade – rising, growing, shrinking, then disappearing completely and later reappearing again. No doubt it was the path. She got on it, went and ran, while the surroundings, places and sceneries were changing, shifting, dancing in a fluid motion, spinning and whirling around her. 

Continue reading “Shadow Path (part 4)”

Shadow Path (part 3)

Parts:
1st part;
2nd part;
3d part;
4th part;
5th part


Ani turned off her laptop and took her phone. It was already evening, and she was afraid of running into Leo on her way. The girl looked around, and listened carefully. She couldn’t hear her brother; he probably was in his room, definitely not outside, because she didn’t hear the slam of the door. Ani approached it and listened: still, there was no evidence of sound. She held her breath and glided silently into the hall, carefully and soundlessly putting on her coat and her shoes, and sneaked past the door…

Continue reading “Shadow Path (part 3)”

Shadow Path (part 2)

Parts:
1st part;
2nd part;
3d part;
4th part;
5th part

Ani had a lot of energy because of the long rest she had taken, and she didn’t want to sit still in one place. Once again, she crossed the room several times, looking out of the windows, or staring at random things on her way, she leafed through a book, then looked inside a cup, took her smartphone and found that the battery was dead as usual… She threw it on the sofa without looking. Nothing of importance.  After a second of silent reflection, she started searching on the shelves randomly, chaotically, looking for her pills. Nothing. ‘What does Leo think he’s doing? I can call the doctor on my own without a glimpse of hesitation and complain, and claim he’s lying, he can’t threaten me! Manipulator! It is all his fault anyways.’ The girl rummaged further angrily through the shelves, then pulled out the drawers sharply to check what was inside. She also examined the desk, the tops of the bookcase and the dresser, until eventually she stumbled upon the notepad with an intricate cover and wondered what it could possibly be. Finally, assuming that it was her brother’s, she opened it, out of spite, smiling vindictively. ‘I’ll show you’…

Continue reading “Shadow Path (part 2)”

Shadow Path (part 1)

Parts:
1st part;
2nd part;
3d part;
4th part;
5th part

*Anima: soul (the meaning which was chosen by me for this story)

**Leo: (in astrology) the sign where the Sun is domiciled (Sun is the ruler there and it is strong). Leo and the Sun stand for the Ego and can symbolize utter selfishness at the low level of self-development (primitiveness).

‘To sleep, to dream, to dive into the depth of the endless ocean which hides millions of barely existing realities on the brim of your imagination. When you fall asleep, the warmth and softness surround you, lulling and carrying you to the void, to the darkest darkness where you do not exist anymore, where you feel pain no more, and where you are unified with the Universe. And then you find yourself diving into the utmost depth of the boundless ocean, where you become whole, accepted, and never alone. You sway in its waters and get carried away by its currents to all existing memories, hopes, causes, outcomes, futures, pasts, presents –  all possible variations of time. You can choose your favorite one… Why does anyone even want to wake up?

Sure, there are nightmares, but reality is also full of them, isn’t it? There are dark sides in every possible representation of infinity; otherwise nothing could be compound, complicated and mysterious, definitely not as intriguingly contrastive as any crowd would like. Though, in comparison with reality, our dreams are more subtle. Everything moves and shifts its shape like a fog, or like a cloud: now you see a forest, and than it turns out to be a castle, and later perhaps a ship, or isn’t it the old man’s bald head? Strange. But so vague, dynamic and playful. You can discover all the answers and the hints in your dreams; all kinds of knowledge: spiritual, psychological, or occult. Everything may reveal itself before you when you are open and sensitive enough – I am. I love to sleep. I live to sleep. I’d die…’

Continue reading “Shadow Path (part 1)”

Steps

I always heard these footsteps as a child. They were thumping somewhere above the ceiling, then closer, approaching the door. I heard them clearer and clearer as they passed the threshold, and later the hall, walking back and forth. I held my breath, hiding behind the sofa, sitting very still, motionless, only my heart pounded hectically, crazily. And despite that quick, loud melody of my heartbeat, I heard the heavy breath and the millions and myriads of movements and whispers out there.

Sometimes, as it seemed to my disturbed imagination, they were intermingled with dark and catchy verses and tales. And when my ear was tuned to that narrative which absorbed me gradually, the visions of the strangest scenes and faces appeared before my eyes, and I was sure that all of these could have happened to me: in the different lives and the different epochs. And that this voice and these steps were the messages of Nemesis, the echoes of revenge. It was different when I was so young, of course. I was frightened to death, but curious as hell, and after some inquiries, I learned that some of these events really had taken place very long before I got to know them.

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Towards the Bus Stop

The calming velvet darkness covered her tightly, weaving the net of dreams inside her head. The girl stirred in her bed, shuddered and then unwillingly opened her eyes, “So cold!” First wish was to continue sleeping, never give up that realm of warmth, of acceptance… And whatever else she had never seen in her life. Then she laid still, waiting for her mother to wake up.

Elise laid silently and listened, but caught no motion in the bathroom or the hall. “What the hell is she doing? Perhaps she has already gone, and I just didn’t hear it”. Anyway, she had to wake up finally, so she sat down with a moan of disappointment, waited until the head became clear and the world before her eyes became stable enough to stand up and continue the morning routine. “It’s so dark outside…” The girl was utterly surprised to find neither a sound, nor the slightest movement in their flat and outside. Painful and overwhelming “I’m late!” rang in her head, made her heart run and jump chaotically in her chest. Unknown and unperceived power drew her out of her flat – faster… faster. Faster! “I’m always late!”

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September reading (five books monthly)

Autumn is a time to study, to slow down, to reflect on something, to cough loudly, to embrace the sadness and the beauty of the season, to listen to the wail of the windy, mesmerizing patter of rain and… To read 🙂 By the way, I personally was spending last week just as descibed. I also wrapped myself in blanket, hugged my cat and lit the candles 😀 Also there was a great reading “revolution” in my life… But you will find the details at the end of this post.
I also decided to write a little bit on several books, because my first review written in this blog was somewhat looong and complicated. I like complicated things 😉 But no one except me does 😀

From this page

“Powrót z Gwiazd” – Stanisław Lem // Return from the Stars by Stanisław Lem

Continue reading “September reading (five books monthly)”

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